I’m A Giant Gorilla Who Fell For A Blonde. Did My Best To Make Her Love Me, She Still Screams In My Hand, Why?
Hi,
I am Kong, some call me King. But I would give all my kingdom for the love of the blonde who won’t love me back. How can I get her to love me?
I made all my moves. I took her out top of empire state building. I washed her underneath tropical rain and waterfalls.
Still she doesn’t seem to care. Is it because of who I am? Is it because, I’m a giant gorilla and she’s a woman?
I am well hung. Shouldn’t that solve the problem? I fear she might be the end of me.
Help me.
Dear Kong,
Inter-species relationships can be so difficult! If your parents are okay with it, hers may not be. Your friends don’t like to hang out with her friends. And the cultural and religious differences; we won’t even go there!
Wake up and smell the coffee, Kong. Would you be happy living in the ‘burbs, mowing the grass, taking the kids to soccer? Would you feel like a king then? (What if kids aren’t even possible? Would you be satisfied with adoption? Would she?)
Kong, it may hurt now, but parting ways will be best for you in the long run. Why don’t you go down to the zoo tonight and see if you can’t pick up a cute lady belonging to your own species. You’ll be glad you did.
Sincerely,
Ann Landers
Try brushing your teeth, you have Gorilla breath.
make the sacrifice climb the building and get shot by the planes as i think you are one banana short of the bunch
and i think you should be well HUNG
She’s screaming coz she’s afraid of heights..try to put her a little lower like your foot, but dont make a step if dont wanna lose her..
Now, are you quite certain it was her in your hand, and that she was screaming at you? Or could it possibly have been what was left of your alleged ‘hung-ness’ that was left in your hand after your last masturbatory fantasy, where your mom walked in on you and you ripped the lil guy off in your sexual stupor while lamely attempting to cover yourself– and those screams that ensued forthwith were, in all actuality, animal-like gutteral utterances from your own or-al orifice?
Whichever the case, if I had Naomi Watts in MY paws, I’d have a hard time lettin’ her get away from me– skroo climbin’ the Empire State Building! We’d be in a suite at the finest hotel in town!
Your peepee must be even bigger than she is. That might be the reason she’s freaking out.
You got it all wrong, hon! That she screams in your hand is a definite sign that she loves you back.
Women love playing hard to get, they like to be chased. (It’s an animal instinct, how come you don’t get this?)
Just give her what she wants, she’ll come around. Till then, you hang in there!
Good luck.
she’d better love the smartest Turk!
belki cok guclusundur,abi